Bummer Summer

by flashlights

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released June 24, 2014

Recorded at The Fidelitorium in Kernersville, NC
Produced by Scott Hutchison and Andy Monaghan
Engineered by Andy Monaghan, Bob Engel, and Wesley Wolfe
Mixed by Casey Bates
Mastered by Howie Weinberg
Cover Art by Sean Hartman
Music written by Flashlights
All lyrics written by Terry Caudill



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flashlights Florida

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Track Name: Failure
This is not the bed I remember making. Your nails are made
of glass, cutting up my heart into pieces. Talking to myself
when yesterday's repeating. I can't go on like this.

Fall apart just to recollect that I'm a failure.
All the moments I spent with you, what was it all for?
I break my fucking back day after day and that's what hurts.
You got me on my knees.

Say it to my face one more time. I dream about
all the promises you made to me. Out of focus.
Out of place.

Smile. I'm okay giving up secrets. It drives me crazy.
Just give me something. Make-up on your face.
Make me your favorite shape. I missed you all day below the surface.
Trying out new things. Trying to replace what makes me crazy.
Everything scares me. Don't you want to stay? Was it something I did?
Open me up again. Tell me you will come back. Tell me.
Track Name: Don't Take Me Seriously
It's across my face again. Call me out, I already knew.
Too far apart to tell you the truth.
It's too much to say, something I just can't take.
There's a difference in your smile today.
I see it when the sun hits your face. I see memories of who I used to be.

Color in the lines, it's making me sad.
Do you care if I look like a wreck? Biting down to ignore the pain.
Laughing at the songs you can sing. It's all talk with you sometimes.
I can't feel you out. I want to be what matters. I can't be around
just to make you feel at home. You can never be alone.

That's not how I work
but I like it at first.

Back at home, my girlfriend doesn't talk to me.
I walk to my job to make next to nothing. Stand over the sink
and spit in the dishes. Look into my reflection when I just can't do this.

Waking up to no one. Go back to sleep to find myself being someone.
Most of the time I feel like I'm no one.
Track Name: All Cats Are Beautiful
In front of everything, you're inside and out to me.
Don't be shy. I'm a nice guy. Behind the things you say,
it's all way too nice. That's what I like.

But, what if I smiled 32 candles?
Wax on the edge of my lips. Does it all fit?

I'm not the same face I used to want to be.
I want to find a place in the moments I'm free.
I'm letting go. Untangle me from your hold. It's simple.

I forgot how to taste. Talk to me. What a long week.
Laying down in the snow, it's better when you're with me.
Track Name: Bottle Kids
Like a ship sinking on the lake, take your time
washing up on the shore. There are worst things
than what you're facing. Take a break.

I see me and you tacking on hours of sitting still.
Lying in the road waiting for some inspiration.
Lie to get some time of 'cause I need to get drunk.
My hands are worth nothing. Scratching off the years I've lived in.
Caught in the headlights. Getting hit like lost flies. What a mess.
Track Name: Best Friends
I started out new. Someone who couldn't talk about you.
About the fire on your fingertips, on your tongue.
Someone that's a best friend, I'm not the one.
It wasn't your laugh, the way you looked at me,
or the time in parking lot you kissed me. Before now,
none of it to me felt real. Even when I had you in my arms,
you disappeared.

Fuck that day. I'm a fucking person, not a mistake.
To me, you're all the reasons why I'm out of bed everyday.

I'm just like you, too cool to treat you like I want to.
Other people never understand. It's been mixing in conversations.
Not enough is said. I'm sick of these games. I keep repeating your name. Next thing, I know you're back is turned. You want to push me away. I'm getting used to being let down.

Even if you want me around, fuck this place. I can be a human
but I always make mistakes. Everyday I go outside, I look for a change.
Why do I try? Why am I searching for an answer even you can't find.
What does it mean when you tell me you can take your time?

Fucked up days keep me coming back. I know it's just a phase.
You're the reason why I'm always down everyday. You know I try
harder than I would. It gets me every time. What can I do to prove to you
I need you in my life?
Track Name: Sometimes It's Hard To Speak
It hurts when your fingers scratch my back.
My heart beats the more and the more when you kiss my lips.
You left marks on my neck from your teeth.
That's the most you've spoken to me all week. Sometimes it's hard to speak. It was the smell of your hair that made it hot in here. I think it's just me. My bed smells like sweat. It made me happy that you missed it. Could you taste it on my neck? Still, I'm going to miss sitting by the river. I was thinking that it feels like winter. Holding my hand, you said, "I want to drown in the ocean."

Just take me with you. I'll sail where the wind takes us to.
I want to be with you. I'll follow where your fingers point me to.
Sitting by the river, I was thinking that it feels like winter.
When you hold my hand, with you, I can't breath. With you,
I feel like I'm drowning in the ocean.

Sometimes it's hard to speak.
Track Name: Islands
I wish I said I'm sorry. I wish I could make you love me.
The time I'm wasting when I can't go to sleep.
Waste all your time on me. Tell me the reason
why you can't sleep with out me at night.
Is there something missing? I feel it when we kiss. I know what's missing.

You're night and day with decisions that are hard to make.
I wanted to see flowers. I wanted to be fixed. Is it gonna change me?
I'm looking at it both ways. It's like we have the same face.
It's tearing me apart. Look at us, we stop and start.
I can't take the blame.

If you get over these things, let me know how you're doing tomorrow.
You know I'd do anything. Even when you hurt me. I love the way
you whisper my name. We're naked in your bed sheets. You're alone with me. Does this make me easy? I know you wanna fuck me. I want you more than anything.

I waited for you. It feels like a life time.
My heart keeps racing. You know what you do to me.
Tomorrow, I'll kiss you. Just tell me you still love me.
The freckles on your back remind me of brown islands.
Track Name: Bummer Summer
Living like I can't breathe. It's in my head.
It's all me missing who I used to be.
It used to be so easy. I used to be out going.
Talk shit on my apologies. I isolated everything
and everyone around me.

When it all came down to how I feel everyday,
I might as well feel nothing.

When will you change me? I do what I can to feel
like I'm free. Sometimes I wanna kill me.
Tie a knot and see what's waiting at the ending for me.
What's waiting at the ending for me?

If it wasn't for the line I always followed, where would I stray?
Would I end up like my dad, long gone, give up on the ones I love?
Will I be the same person in the end? Talking like I don't deserve shit.
You got me all wrong.